Horoscopes and Why I Love Them

Posted: 10 January, 2019 in Astrology, Rants
Tags: ,

No, Seriously. I Really Do!

Evgeny Gromov/Getty Images

Somewhere I once read this pithy bit of Internet Truth: “Horoscopes work, whether you believe in them or not.”

Well, I don’t believe in them, or in any other self-fulfilling system of prophecies — especially when so many folks who make their claims only do so after the event they supposedly “foretold.”

Just for a laugh, I’ve spent the past 2 years reading my daily horoscope and recording it in a journal. At the same time, I’ve done the same thing with 4 other randomly-selected other Zodiac signs.

What I’ve discovered is that over that 2 year period, everything that was predicted for me eventually showed up in the other signs as well — with the exact same wording!

I know enough about database creation and data normalization to make this claim: most horoscopes are generated by database queries operating on necessarily-limited data points, resulting in inevitable duplicate prognostications which are then claimed to be accurate forecasts.

(This is where I stopped to take a breath.)

My horoscope for today included this gem of wisdom: “If you had changed one thing you did yesterday, today might be different in some way.”

Duh. That can’t possibly be unique to my sign (Gemini). Hell, even legitimate scientists know that, and even have a term for it: the Butterfly Effect. It’s at the heart of chaos theory.

At the risk of starting a flame war (oh, wait…that won’t happen. This is Medium, not Facebook), I view astrology in the same light as Biblical prophecy: if God indeed has a plan, it’s indistinguishable from someone who has no plan at all.

And to all you “prophets” out there, make your prophecies public before they happen, not after.

Daily horoscopes aren’t worth the newsprint they’re published on.

 

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.